


The Video

by TWriter



Series: To Fall or To Fly [13]
Category: Nightwing (Comics)
Genre: Don't jump to any conclusions, Suicidal Thoughts, Video Letter
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-05
Updated: 2015-11-05
Packaged: 2018-04-30 05:15:28
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 991
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5151638
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TWriter/pseuds/TWriter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bruce sees the video letter Dick was going to leave for him and the rest of his friends and family. Takes place ~9-12 months after the events of "To Fly."</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Video

_I’ve kept this saved for a long time._  
_Each year, I redo it. I add any changes based on the year before, and rerecord._  
_Sometimes, I add new people, and messages meant for them._  
_Sometimes, I take people out, because I’ll be seeing them soon enough._  
_Each year, I rerecord, then celebrate having made to do so. Each of you has probably gotten a call from me, with the request to go out and do something fun. We go to dinner. We go see that new movie. We head to a bar. We go to a club. Or we sit, order takeout, and just enjoy ourselves on the couch. Without fail, you ask why I seem so celebratory, and each one gets the same response: “Isn’t it enough to just be alive?”_  
_We’ve arrived on that date again, as I sit and tell you this. I’m sitting here, on that day, to tell you that I love you. That’s the part that never changes._  
_I started this at 18. I sat down one day, determined that if this was going to happen, you all needed to know a few things. And I recorded it. I poured my heart out onto that film, turned off the camera, and went to sleep. I mentally prepared myself for the next day._  
_When I woke up the next morning, I thought I was ready. But as I looked at the materials I gathered, I realized I couldn’t. I was too scared. So I put them away, in a box in the back of my closet, behind my costume, and saved them, and this video, for another day._  
_When I found the video again, while looking through files on my hard drive, I realized it was dated. New people had come into my life. Some had left. So I redid it, telling myself that it needed to be up to date, so that it was one thing less to worry about when I was finally ready._  
_Each year I revisited, for the next 10 years, and rerecorded. So here we are, 10 years later. I guess I’m still not quite ready. But when I am, this will be here, and the file name will be written down for you to find. But knowing some of you, I doubt you’d need the help._  
_So here’s some things I need to say._  
_Roy, Wally, you two are all I ever needed in friends. I knew, from the moment I met you both, that we would still be the best of pals 30 years from then, and hopefully we still will be. Thank you, for all that you’ve done for me._  
_Babs. Babs. I don’t even know where to start. I’ve loved you forever. I know it never worked; it probably never will. But I love you. I love you for all that you are, regardless of how you feel about me. I love you more than anything._  
_Alfred, you were the best grandfather a boy could have asked for. You were everything I needed at any time; a shoulder, an ear, a friend, a coconspirator. I hate that… never mind. Love you._  
_Dami, I know it’s hard. I know how hard-headed Bruce can be, but you’re a fairly even match. Try not to be too hard on him. He does his best. I’ll miss you._  
_Timmy, don’t be too upset about it all. I know it might be a lot, but I’m not worth it. I’m not worth any sadness. Just remember to let lose every once in a while, okay? Workaholic suits you, but it isn’t everything about you._  
_Jason, I’m sorry I couldn’t save you. I’m sorry I missed the funeral. I’m sorry I was barely there, I’m sorry for all of it. It’s my biggest regret. You never deserved any of it, little brother._  
_Bruce. I owe you a lot more, but I can only offer a thank you. Thank you for taking me in. For giving me a place to stay. For letting me in on the crusade. For teaching me. For loving me, even if you don’t say it. I can tell. Thank you for taking in that broken orphan and helping him piece himself back together. Thank you, Dad._  
_I’m sorry. I truly am. I wish I had another explanation, some sort of reasoning. But I’m too tired. Of life, of the sadness, of everything._  
_Don’t blame yourselves. There is nothing you could have done. I love you all. I just don’t love myself._  
Dick clicked the pause button, freezing the frame on his face, a sad smile from a year before gracing it. He exited out of the window, feeling a hand on his shoulder as he looked at the list of videos from the past ten years.  
“Was that really what I would have watched?” asked Bruce.  
“That was the idea.”  
“I can’t believe I didn’t know.”  
“You’re a master detective, Bruce. But sometimes the best detective misses what is right in front of his face.”  
“I’m glad we finally noticed.”  
“Me too.”  
Dick looked back at the list of file. He had saved each one, always updating. He highlighted each file, and clicked DELETE. He glanced back at his mentor.  
“One more thing,” said Bruce. He handed Dick a box, the one he had found in his closet. The contents were, to say the least, concerning.  
Dick took the box, glancing at the contents. A length of rope, several razor blades, a bottle of pills. He had intended to use all three, if possible. He wanted to be sure his attempt was a success.  
Rising from his computer chair, he strode out the room. He made two stops. The first, a bathroom. The second, the den, where a fire blazed. He returned to his guardian, the box now empty.  
“You know, most of what I said was true. Still is.”  
“Oh?”  
“I love you.”  
“I love you too, Dick.”

**Author's Note:**

> And so ends the series, right where it began almost a year ago. Once again, I hope you all enjoyed, and thanks for reading!


End file.
